Into the Underworld
Time, space, and silence: three things that all writers need in order to flourish. But what do you do when time becomes your enemy?
Writing Updates
I just finished the very first draft for the sequel to A Murder of Crows; if all goes well, I should be able to start releasing it next year. My short story "We are Made to Bloom" is also slated for publication in August — keep an eye out for it next month, from Uncharted Mag! Currently working on edits for A Lullaby of Stolen Stars. We'll see how far we get while being on pain meds.
Into the Underworld
I have a confession to make: I've never been the best when it comes to rest. Even as a child — four-years-old, not even kindergarten yet — naptime was my least favourite part of the day. I remember begging my mother for five more minutes every time she would try to drag me home from the playground. I didn't want to end the fun, no matter how stumbly or sleepy I was. Waking time was precious, and I wanted to take advantage of as much of it as possible.
And then I entered adolescence, and my body turned on me. Suddenly, time was no longer just a precious resource — in the span of a few years, it became scarce as well. I began a battle with depression that stole years from my life. Every month, I found myself worn down and exhausted, unable to fully commit to much of anything outside of the one good week my body allowed me.
Much of my adult life has been defined by a struggle against time. There have never been enough hours in the day to write all the stories I want to. Worse, aenemic fatigue and cycles of depression have often robbed me of the energy needed to take full advantage of the time I do have. But with every passing year, I've learned more about myself and what I need to do in order to fight better, to stay standing longer, to keep myself going, even when going seems impossible.
But I still never truly learned to rest, which brings me to now.
As you're reading this, I'm likely fully unconscious, laid out on an operating table in a hospital in Barcelona. But then again, maybe we haven't gotten that far yet. Maybe we're still in the pre-op stages, answering the doctor's questions and waiting for them to put me under. Or maybe you're reading this late at night, and I'm drifting in a hospital bed, drowsy from anesthetic and morphine.
If I were writing a story, this would be the part where we descend into the underworld, searching for the boon in our fight against time. But for all the scary parts of undergoing surgery, for me, it's the next six weeks that will be the hardest — the six weeks of rest necessary for recovery. I'm stopping my entire life for longer than I ever have before, all in the hopes that things will be better when I return.
Maybe it'll be worth it. I certainly hope it will be, but there's no real way to know for certain. Still, everything we do as humans is limited not only by how much time we have, but also by how we conceive of time: there's no looking into the future. All we can do is look back, and see what lessons we can glean.
So I'll be quiet here for a bit, resting. Perhaps I'll finally learn how to take that nap.
An Extraordinary Atlas
I've been thinking lately about fictional worlds. Worldbuilding has always been my favourite part of the writing process, and the settings I use in my stories are a big reflection on that. I also cannot help but love a Tolkein-style appendix in the books I read. I'm considering starting a substack — or at the very least a section on this substack — compiling a collection of travel guides for fictional worlds.
If you're a sf/f writer or creator and want to contribute, or a reader with a burning obsession for a fictional world in a book, game, or movie, I'd love for you to get involved! What’s a fictional world you never get tired of? Let's talk.
The Reading Update
The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller - A gorgeous read that cements Miller's place as the modern adapter of classic tales | Romancing the Beat by Gwen Hayes - Am I really contemplating writing a kissing book? (Maybe) | Folk Magic and Healing: An Unusual History of Everyday Plants - Fully embracing my inner herbwitch, because obviously
Read any of these? I’d love to hear your thoughts and what you’ve been reading and working on, down in the comments.
Wishing your a full and speedy recovery!
It's taken me a while to learn what kind of rest I need, and it keeps changing for me too. I hope you have a good recovery and that you find joy in taking the time to heal too. I also read The Song of Achilles recently and loved it.